Phoenix

It’s time….
to cast off my flawed humanity
to dress my wounds
to caress my soul
to mend my heart
to free my spirit
to forgive myself
to allow myself to be forgiven
to stop apologising
to stop eulogising the past
to stop dying every day
to reject negative premise
to be uncompromising in my resolve
to derive strength from experience
to face the future without fear
to count my many blessings
to rediscover my tenacity
to embrace change
to learn from it all
to love myself more
to truly breathe again
to turn into the wind
to have hope
to have faith
to be brave
to move on
to dream
to grow
to love
to live
to be…
a new me

Too Much – An Apology

I can be “too much”
at times
Too Much
for others
and sometimes
TOO MUCH
…..for myself
I see a thread
and I pull at it,
I. Pull. At. It.
SEARCHING
for answers
even though every fibre
in my body
is urging me to
STOP
I’m too driven
too focused
on seeing it through
on self-destruction
RESISTANCE
is futile
I continue
to pull at it,
pull at it
keep pulling at it
blindly
unaware
that not only
am i
pulling;
but also pushing,
You
– away
INEVITABLY
I pull harder
pulling
grasping
unravelling it
’til there’s nothing left
to pull at
nothing at all
NOTHING
only then,
bereft,
at my willful
destruction
of the pile of loose ends
In my hands
do I
REFLECT…..
I stop feeling
like I’m “too much”
and start feeling like
I’m “not enough”